Vinny - Life in a Bottle

I got sick of it - I cut my nails. Apparently it's my body now anyway, so who was going to stop me?

Art - Elizabeth, whoever she is now, the Asian chick, told me what she'd discovered in her room. Truth be told, I didn't even recall seeing a set of luggage in my room when I checked in, which was really the only time I'd been sober enough to even consider what was in my room while I was in it. But sure enough, there was a suitcase sitting there in my closet that I hadn't noticed before.

Elizabeth had left a note. The previous owner of this body had been decidedly more wordy. There are at least 20 typed pages for me to read, and I haven't even gotten through all of it yet - I've needed time to digest some of what I've been told.

Here's the short version of what I know so far. Apparently, I'm now Sarah Hansen - a 20-year-old woman from Hibbing, Minnesota. That's probably where the accent is from. The woman who had been Jake mentioned to me after I revealed this new found fact that she'd heard the accent in the movie "Fargo." I've never seen it, so I have to take her word for it.

Anyway, I'm apparently a junior at Mount Holyoke College, which is in Massachusetts. I don't know anything about the school yet so I'm going to have to do a little research. Minnesota to Massachusetts seems like an awful long way to travel just for school, but I guess it would explain why someone from Minnesota would possibly be in Maine.

Aside from having difficulty dealing with all of this new information, I was also somewhat distracted by the contents of the suitcase. With my new chest having become quite a bother to me over the last couple of days, I decided to swallow my pride and donned my first bra. It's a size 38-D. Wonderful. This is my cosmic punishment for being a breast man.

Everything is changing too quickly. I really need to go to bed and keep thinking all of this through in the morning.