After agreeing to meet Kiara's nameless friend at "the beach," I immediately felt like I was in way over my head. But how could I not? Someone is monkeying with my life and has transformed me into a 17-year-old girl. The only way I was going to get out of this was to go through it. In this case, that meant dressing myself up and meeting with a bunch of teens/twentysomethings for a beach party, retrieving Kiara's second phone, and getting out.
In this case, slacks and a white button-up weren't going to cut it. I saw no reason to buy myself a special outfit for the occasion when it would seem Kiara had packed exclusively for beach parties. Unfortunately all of her bikinis were quite flimsy on top, but have you seen what they charge for swimwear? (That little fabric for $50??) So I strapped myself into it and threw a dress on over top, hoping I would have no occasion to take it off. It's the most aware of my boobs I have been so far... mostly they are kept in place by a bra, after all, and then if I can get away with it, stifled under a big Men's sweater or whatever. This left the girls, the Kiara-ness of it all, nowhere to hide.
The dress. Let's talk about this. It was form-fitting, skin-revealing, low cut with a slit, but still kind of modest, ankle-length beachwear with a palmtree pattern in a breathable fabric. I've never worn anything like this in my life except, I don't know, a hospital gown or a robe. Looking in the mirror, I couldn't help noticing the shape and size of my hips, as well as of course my breasts... after all, as far as this body is concerned, all these parts have already done the job they were meant for and developed to (I hope) their fullest.
But that didn't mean they didn't look good. I had to look away once I realized I was staring. Did I think Kiara looked good, or that I looked good? Like it was somehow "correct" that Kiara looked this way, irrespective of the fact that it was me inside. Either way was problematic and unwanted. There must be some kind of "self-image appreciation" gene baked into the body that I inherited because it's not like I was turned on, I just felt kind of... nice. Which is not something I'm used to feeling in my own body anyway.
Anyway, like so many other things, I stuffed that feeling down. I figured in the dim light, there would be no point in putting on makeup, and aside from her blemishes Kiara looks okay au naturel as far as I'm concerned. If I can get through this entire year without learning anything about mascara, I'll consider it a win.
I went down to the beach and located my new "friend" Jaymes. He was busy with a volleyball game with some girls who are objectively more attractive than Kiara, but he showed me where the cooler was so I took a seat and nursed a beer -- I'm careful not to get drunk while working, and I don't know how much booze this body can handle, but it would seem weird not to have a drink.
I chatted with some of the other girls -- (oh damn, I just realized I wrote "other girls," as if I am one. And I guess I am) -- although I have absolutely no idea what teenage girls talk to each other about. Luckily one of the girls, Mara (whose body was a lot more on display than mine, which made me feel... weird...) just wanted to show me a bunch of Tiktoks, so that broke the ice.
Finally, I got ahold of Jaymes again. "Oh, sorry, I left the phone back at the house." How convenient. "But we can totally go there now."
Let's see... in my first week of girlhood, am I going to go be alone with a guy I just met who outweighs me by about a hundred pounds of muscle?
I grabbed Mara and told her "Hey, guess what? Jaymes wants to move the party back to his place, grab some people!" Jaymes immediately started to backpedal. Apparently I had thwarted his plan, and succeeded in gathering a group back to the place.
We ended up in the kitchen playing Truth or Dare of all things. I stuck with truth, telling the story of how I lost my virginity to Emma Leighton in Junior year of high school, with Emma replaced by "Brad." Mara got dared to kiss any girl in the room and for a second I hoped she'd pick me but it's probably for the best that she picked her friend. Jaymes got dared to leave his hand on my breast for five minutes, which it seems like I should have gotten some say in, but I say there like a good sport, biding my time.
I nudged Jaymes about the phone again. He said it was up in his room, but he might need some help finding it. It was like pulling teeth with this guy. I almost had an easier time with my super-secret source, but maybe I was just getting antsy because I was increasingly aware of my body over the last few days. I followed him up, but stood in the open doorway with my arms crossed defensively under my boobs while he feigned to search.
"You should relax, Kiara. Something's gotten into you."
"Yeah, something has all right," I rolled my eyes.
"Come on in, the water's nice." He sat on the bed and patted a place on the bed where he wanted me to sit. Now I was pissed. "We had fun, didn't we?"
I'll bet he did.
"How much do you know about me?" I asked.
"I know you're from N.C. I know you've got trouble at home. And I know you like to be..." well, I won't tell you what he told me Kiara likes, but I can assure you I wouldn't be up for it.
I exhaled. "Do you know I've got a kid?"
He froze. "Huh?"
"Yeah. I've got a seven-month-old waiting for me back in North Carolina. The sooner you give me this phone, the sooner I can get back to her."
Instantaneously, he pulled the phone out from behind his bedside lamp and handed it to me.
That was lucky -- for a lot of guys that wouldn't be a dealbreaker.
I said a quick goodbye to Mara -- the only person at the party I didn't totally dislike -- and tromped off into the night.
Just my luck, though -- this phone didn't have facial recognition or thumbprint ID. It was password-protected.
But at least I have it.
I got home and felt thankful I had been wearing a swimsuit, because my nipples had started leaking at some point. I strapped on the pumps and typed all this out, and now I think I'm just abut ready to go to bed...
Ready to face a whole new slew of problems tomorrow.
-Tom/Kiara
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