I went to work like is becoming usual yesterday, after spending another relatively uneventful weekend hanging around with Raymond. Not uneventful in that we didn't do anything, just that in that we didn't do anything. I wonder if this is what being married feels like, where you're in and out of each other's lives and business but the sex drive just isn't all that prominent any more. And, I know, not every marriage is like that, and these two aren't even married, but... You know. They've been together ten years, maybe they feel there's nothing new to see. Which is pretty darn good for me.
In some ways, it's actually kind of nice to have him in the bed next to me. It's a primal, instinctive thing, liking the warm body next to you. I don't really mind that there's always coffee on when I get up, since he's always up before me. He's also pretty decent with the grill he keeps out on the deck, although I wonder how much longer he'll be going out there to make us dinner on the weekends with fall hitting like a brick wall.
There's a reason for all this. Ray's a good guy. I'm not as scared by the one bed in the apartment as I was, although it's still plenty scary. I'd like having the guy as a roommate under normal circumstances.
But, back to work. It's not far away from the apartment - they're both described as near the Harvard Square T stop, although kind of in opposite directions - so I've picked up Liz's habit of biking to and from on decent days. I got there a little early yesterday, so bumping into the FedEx guy on the way out. Janet was working the box office, and after saying hi, I asked if they were dropping off or picking up. Dropping off, she said, and hefted one of those flimsy-looking mailing envelopes that nevertheless can't be ripped; it looked like it had a couple trailers in it. I said I'd bring them up to the booth, and she went back to dropping her ones into the lockbox.
I stowed the bike in a closet and then headed upstairs. The projection room was relatively quiet, since Stewart tends not to run a film if no tickets have been sold by the start time, and Monday afternoons aren't the busiest. I saw him, waved, said we got a couple new trailers, and headed toward the cutting table to put them down. He said "long time no see", I pointed out that as head manager, he makes the schedules, and he said that was true enough.
Before I could turn around to head back downstairs, he'd walked up behind me, put his arms around me, and leaned over so his head was right next to mine. "I love the way you smell when you've just rode in," he says, and then does this exaggerated inhaling thing, sucking in my sweaty scent. Before I've got a chance to remark on how creepy that is, he's kissing my neck, his right hand is squeezing my left breast, and his right hand is heading south! "Whoa," I say, ducking down and out of his arms, "what the hell are you doing?"
He looks a little confused, and then smiles. "Things with Ray must be less exciting than I thought, if you don't even remember what sex is."
I stammer a bit at this point, saying that oh, I know what sex is, and he says he hopes so, since it's only been a couple months, and I say hey, sorry, just surprised, was all. Then I go leave the projection room, go into the office, and hyperventilate.
At first I think he's trying to trick me into spreading my legs for him even though that's something Elizabeth wouldn't do, but that doesn't make any sense. No-one believes I'm not Elizabeth Lee, and unless he knew and believed that, the whole trick angle is stupid. No, I think, Elizabeth must have slept with her boss sometime before going to Old Orchard Beach on vacation.
At this point I run to the bathroom and throw up a little. I'm not just upset about being in this situation, I'm kind of disappointed. From what I could tell, Liz seemed like a nice girl - helps a friend get a job, keeps in touch with old roommates, living with a pretty decent guy, good taste in books and movies. And now I see she's done this, and then given me no warning about it. Maybe I've just built her up too much in my head or something, but this doesn't seem right.
But, it's something that's got to be dealt with. I clean up a bit and then look in the mirror. I know the look in Stewart's eyes. He may just have been playing around before, but he's figuring on getting lucky sometime that night. I recall that the way things ended last Wednesday, it seems like Liz doesn't like to have sex when she's having her period. If my math's right, this is about when she usually would. So I can put Stewart off for a few days and it won't look terribly weird. Unless he brings it up with Ray, but if that's the case then I may not be the weirdest part of this love triangle I've fallen into (if I can be a little melodramatic).
So I do that, and it works. I get through our shift without much difficulty, since I don't have that much cause to go up in the booth and he apparently isn't flaunting our relationship (if it's anything more than at-work booty calls) in front of the staff.
Discretion is good.
But, man, this just buys me a few days.
And I thought my life was twisted.
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