Monday, June 16, 2014

Cal/Angie: Objective Incomplete

I should be happy. I should be carefree. I'm here, I'm back in Maine just waiting for my number to get called. If all goes according to plan (fingers crossed) I'll be back in my regular boring old life in a few days and won't have to deal with periods, long hair, or boys ever again in my life.

It was a nail biter to get here, saving every spare penny from my job, which became especially important after David and I broke up and I quit. It was the sensible act... "Angie" is guaranteed not to be back for weeks, maybe a month, and I feel like the bridge is totally burned anyway. They all hate me/her, even though I did nothing wrong. Aside from the girls here in Maine, I feel like I've torched Angie's social life.

Maine itself is... different this time. The air feels different on my skin than I remember. The Inn is slightly more spooky-feeling. Maybe it's because I know what goes on here. I got this intense nausea, like vertigo, when I was walking up to the front door.

"It'll be over soon," Trish said to me.

I smiled back. "Or maybe it'll just be a new adventure."

Trish chuckled a bit. "Just make sure you're in the right room and you'll be fine."

I can't help but think about the others, though. I can't believe Grant - not his name anymore, I guess - delayed his return so that he could specifically avoid getting his old body back. I guess I just don't relate. Maybe he does feel more like a woman, but I just... I'm the type of person who wants everything to go back neat and tidy. He, or she, will be back in a few weeks to turn Sophie's body back to her.

And then there's James.

I don't even know the whole story, but something happened a few nights before our flight and he was too sick to come. I don't know if he's going to make it. And if he doesn't, I don't know what happens after that. Does he stay as Keisha? Does he roll the dice?

I feel bad. We may not have been good friends before all this... and hell, we weren't even that close during the whole experience, since I had my falling out with Derek, but I think he deserves to get his chance, same as me. I really hope things turn out okay for him.

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