Friday, August 05, 2011

Lisa- Regrets

Dear Trading Post E-Mail,

Is it weird that I suspect you're not actually affiliated with the Inn? I hope not, because I feel kind of bold tonight (although that may just be the Crown and Coke I have sitting on the nightstand) and I wanna spill my guts a little.

My friend Shaun tells me he said a bit about what brought us here. About how his fiancee broke up with him before the wedding. When he couldn't get rid of the reservation, I came along because I needed to get out of my rut, but truth is, it's just reminding me about some mistakes I've made.

My time to get married came about five years ago. I was in my 20's and had been seeing him for only a year, so I thought it was too soon even though I really liked him. He took my rejection pretty hard, but I tried to keep the relationship going... he apparently never got over it. Over-emotional, which was his main failing, but otherwise he was a solid guy. Good job, nice hair, great car... guh, I'm driving myself crazy just remembering him.

It was dumb of me to turn him down, but I thought he'd propose again in time, when we were more certain. Our relationship lasted a few months more, then he decided his heart wasn't in it and off he went.

Now, of course, I realize my mistake. I haven't dated anyone seriously since him, and he's married with a kid. That could be me by now!

Well, that's my spilled milk to cry over.

I came along because I was hoping to meet someone. You never know. But it's hard to find guys to chat up when you're constantly surrounded by your male college friends.

It's getting brutal, but even Zane is starting to look decent to me. Shh, don't tell the others. Even Shaun, if I didn't know he would read too much into it, might deserve a pity fuck. But I've never been that girl to any of them, and that's a good thing.

Except now that I need something easy and fun.

Even if I end up regretting it later... which I almost certainly would! Oooof, I have said too much. Blame it on the drinks!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Well, you never know what surprises the future holds....