Maybe. But other things also happen, like New Year's, which Dunia and her friends have been ringing in on the beach since high school. Even though I've been living here and flying to other warm-weather cities for a few months, it hadn't totally sunk in that it was still summer weather - in my head, it just hasn't gotten cold yet. But right around Christmas, I started getting texts from Ceci, Danica, and Ines asking what my schedule was looking like, and after a quick check in with Dunia, I checked her social media history and saw that they did in fact hit the beach every New Year's Eve.
In bikinis.
Now, I've gotten kind of used to having a Dunia-shapes body by now. I still have a minor panic attack on the first day of her period, but what i see in the mirror or while taking a shower every morning doesn't shock me, and I've more or less of come to accept that what's in the closet makes a certain sort of sense. It's got enough that you want some skin exposed to sweat from, the colors I thought were ugly at first look pretty nice on my darker skin, her wedge sandals are comfortable and give me a little extra height, and I'm even okay with my breasts being pushed up and together by her bras and halters. The heels do make my ass sway, but I keep telling myself that it made Dunia feel confident and maybe I'll feel the same by the time spring comes. But I still mostly avoided even touching the drawer with swimsuits or the racks with club stuff.
No avoiding it, though, and I knew from experience by then that a girl takes a while to get ready, especially given that I still so a lot step-by-step from checklists on the phone rather than having any real instinct for it. I spent a couple hours painting nails, doing makeup, and fixing with my hair before sending outfits to Dunia and being told that she wouldn't necessarily have chosen the belted skirt and crop top combo herself, but that it was probably okay for someone as nervous about things getting loose or coming off as me. By the time I was done, Ines arrived to pick me up. Ceci was already in the passenger seat, and Danica would join me in the back.
They hadn't seen Dunia/me for more than a passing word since September, and wanted to know all about the glamorous life of a flight attendant, so I could apply plenty of small talk amid all their relationship drama. They pulled no punches when it came to how their ex-boyfriends were pigs (you hear about how guys have no idea how dirty or frank fields talk when we aren't around, but it's still an earful!) while also making insinuations about what Dunia's was doing while overseas. I defended him, although I've only really talked with him online, tentatively because his hours don't really line up with Dunia's and I'd rather consult her before saying something that could mess things up. Maybe he's dumb enough to cheat on Dunia (not getting into the looks I've inherited, she's pretty cool), because I can say from experience that guys will do really stupid things off the opportunity comes, but if Dunia doesn't think so, I'm not acting like I think so.
At least it let me say "I've got a boyfriend serving overseas and I don't think he'd like that" more that night than I had for the rest of December. Most guys were pretty chill about it - there were a lot of girls in the club showing way more skin and looking more eager to hook up than I was, including Dunia's friends. Ceci seemed to be the one most eager for some sort of rebound fling, too the point where Ines was asking me to help keep an eye on her, while Danica was more looking for the best dancer, because she's really good, to the point where she seems to almost get bored just casually bopping around and shaking her butt. She's got an eye for the guy who can pick her up and spin her, for example, and sometimes the rest of us would just stop what we were doing and watch.
By the time we headed for the beach, there were a couple guys in tow - Ceci hoped in her new friend's passenger seat and I moved up front so Danica and her guy could make out. That left me chatting with Ines, who seems pretty cool, before we got to their favorite public beach.
I had enough rum in me (aside from Dunia being Cuban-American, it's something I don't feel too girly ordering but which doesn't seem too masculine for her) that I was pretty bold bringing my handbag with the little green bikini into the bathroom stall. I figured that I'd put on bra and panty sets dozens of times by this point, and the only difference was that I just wouldn't continue getting dressed. But by the time I had my hand on the door latch so I could go to the sinks and touch up my makeup, I either suddenly sobered up a bit or something, because even with a matching wrap on my hips, my ass suddenly looked twice as huge and inviting as usual my boobs seemed super bouncy, and the thought that any of the knots I had twisted myself to tie in ways you don't learn in the spots could either come loose on their own or at a guy's slightest pull was echoing through my head.
Didn't happen, thankfully, and we had a good time - we don't really have food trucks in North Dakota like they do here, there was a lot of great music, and there were fireworks. I guess that's more "big city" than Miami particularly, although we probably wouldn't have been wearing swimsuits if I'd wound up in Minneapolis! I did kind of find my head spinning because of it, though: Girls in bikinis was always exciting and full of potential and distracting (Ma would go on about how I shouldn't let them distract me or make me give into temptation), and here I was, walking around the beach, getting fried plantains and the like, and it's kind of a head-trip that I'm hanging around with three girls who are acting like it's not really sexy at all most of the time, just talking about their lives, and the fact that I can sort of slip into just chatting and not really be thinking about what dudes are thinking of the show I'm offering, or even feel like I'm putting myself on display, but then I'll notice just how amazing Ceci's rack is and look away embarrassed and wonder if guys are looking at my ass. I mean, obviously, some are, because they will come right up and tell me, sometimes in Spanish, which sounds even weirder, but more on that another day.
It was probably the most fun I can ever remember having on New Year's Eve, though, even if it did end with me being driven home by a very hot girl while we were both wearing bikinis but nothing beyond that. Apparently Dunia coming home practically naked isn't a big deal to her Dad, who was asleep in the recliner until I maybe closed the front door too loud, which I guess isn't a big deal, but, like aren't fathers supposed to be more paranoid about their daughters running around half-naked?
Anyway, I'm glad I did it, and I'm feeling less nervous about answering Dunia's friends' texts now, even if my weird schedule legitimately has me not able to meet up with them that often.
-Toby/Dunia
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