So, I'm blogging because this is the only place someone in my position can vent their feelings that I know of. I don't know how many of our readers actually believe us, or if they actually CAN believe us thanks to the curse, but between them and the other contributors, it sure helps to have someone who listens
Ive been crying for the last two hours, because today has easily been the worst day of my life, which is saying something considering Ive had a day where i changed into another person.
Amber called me today crying. I was at work so i didn't hear her bawling until i checked my voice-mail at lunch. I called her back and she was still upset and when I asked what was wrong she choked out "Greg...Dumped..me.."
Clearly this concerned me in a way that goes beyond "best-friend-shoulder-to-cry-on". So i left work, didn't even think about it. I hadn't taken a sick day all year and it's kindergarten so its not like you need to find a well qualified sub for half a day.
Amber was at her place since they had the fight late last night and she was too upset to go into work. Dee was not in the apartment, so I'm assuming she went to work.
After a big hug and a 2 minute sob, I finally asked her what happened
"Well, I told you about how Greg's been distant for awhile now, and you said it was probably just wedding jitters, and I believed that and he did go out of his way to show me he loved me on Valentine's Day, but after that he just became distant again. The last night..."
She trailed off as she cried at the memory of what happened. I hugged her and when she calmed down she continued
"Last night he came to me and told me he didn't love me and that he had been cheating on me for the last 6 months with his secretary, Heather"
My jaw dropped and I was both shocked and mad. I couldn't say anything. Amber saw the look on my face and continued
"He said that hes fallen in love with her and that he was gonna move in with her and that hes sorry but he just couldn't lie to me anymore"
After that we both broke down crying. After all it was my relationship too, and I was so mad at Dee for doing this to Amber just so she could sleep with my secretary. I comforted and consoled Amber for a few hours until I told her there was something I needed to do and I would be back later.
It was around 4:30 so Dee would still be at work. When I got to the hotel lobby, Heather was at the front desk. She didnt recognize me and said in a very cheerful manner "How may I help you?"
"Yes, may I please speak with your manager?" I said rather curtly. Which in retrospect was kinda mean. Yeah, shes the other woman, but I always liked Heather, shes a nice gal, but kinda quiet. I always sensed she had a crush on me but she was way to mousy to ever make a move and she knew I was engaged.
She turned toward my office which is in a room next to the desk and said "Hun, there's someone here to see you" in a saccharin voice that made my stomach turn. When my old body emerged from the office and saw me he looked only a little bit surprised. "Oh, its you." Dee said flatly "Come on in the back" Heather watched idly curious as I followed him into the office and shut the door.
"I had a feeling Id here from you soon" she said
"What the HELL is going on?" I demanded
She looked me in the eye and in a very calm voice said "I'm sorry you had to find out this way, but things just kinda happened between me and Heather. There was chemistry from Day 1. We have a lot in common and around October we started seeing each other in secret. Amber does nothing for me emotionally or mentally, we just don't click. Having to spend 24 hours a day pretending to love someone like that is just miserable. Heather was the complete opposite and she made me love coming to work and over time ive grown to love her"
I wanted to strangle her. "Well you realize the mess this makes for me? How am I supposed to fix things when I get my body back?"
She looked at the ground
"You don't think..." I started coldly.
"I spent the last 21 years of my life in a marriage that was loveless for the last 15. He and I weren't right for each other and I wasted the better part of my life with him. Now it seems that fate has shown me a new person that is worth it, and given me an opportunity to be with her. I cant just walk away from that..."
"ITS NOT YOURS TO WALK AWAY FROM!" I shouted, not caring if Heather heard or not.
She shushed me "Listen, I'm sorry to have to do this to you, but did you ever think that this is fate trying to tell you something? Like maybe you and Amber don't really belong together?"
I lunged at her. I wanted to choke her right then and there. Sadly she now had about 70lbs on me and held me at bay easily.
"Im gonna need you to calm down or I'm gonna call security" she said firmly "No i suggest you go home and figure out your life and don't come back here again or Ill call the cops"
At that moment, everything went numb. She had all the power. All the leverage. I think this must be what Jake and Art felt like when they first heard that they're lives had been stolen. When I read their stories my reaction was "wow, that sucks for them" and now its just a million times worse. Short of kidnapping Dee and strapping her to a bed in Maine, all my family, friends, and life are gonna be gone.
I left the hotel in silence. I sat on the train on the way home, just staring blankly ahead. A million thoughts going through my head but none really taking hold enough to affect me. It was just a profound sadness.
I couldn't go back to Amber so I went back to my apartment instead. I sent her a text saying I'm sorry and id be over later to help talk to her. Fortunately, her mom had also been keeping her company so she wasn't alone.
It was 6 o'clock when i just collapsed on the couch and started bawling. All the emotions that I felt at first just washed over me. I thought about all my memories with Amber. The day we met. Our first date. The first time we had sex. The day I proposed. Now, those are just memories. Ive been downgraded from love of her life to best friend. Forced to see her every day and be reminded of how horrible things turned out.
I was crying when I started writing this, but now, an hour later, im just sniffling. I guess it does help to write your feelings down, and while im still miserable I can at least function clearly. Able to think. Able to cope with the fact that Im gonna have to live the rest of my life as Priya.
Although the kidnapping idea has its merits....